Still in the Middle

When my former husband and I first separated, I went into a blue funk every time the kids were gone to stay with him instead of me. I'd stay in my pajamas, chain-smoking, reading dreary novels, and crying my eyes out.

Blech! Thank GOD I'm no longer that person.

I absolutely needed that time to mourn then heal - but Lord knows you can't stay that way forever.

Now, I look at the time that the kids are with their father as opportunities to get all of my non-kiddo related things done - chores, errands, Tom Cruise movie marathons, extra client work, projects, school or church work, and Tom Cruise movie marathons. (Did I mention Tom Cruise movie marathons? Just want to be sure I didn't forget that.)

Do I still miss them? Of course. Right now I'm sitting in a house that's waaaaaaay too quiet. The kids have been gone for 25 minutes and will be with their dad through Saturday (with a brief stay back with me because of his work schedule). I'll miss them the whole time they're gone...but I'll still be in the middle of our lives, working on stuff for all of us!

For instance, over the next few days (while I'm still supposed to be convalescing), I'm going to clean out a closet, put up Christmas decorations, put away massively large mountains of clean laundry, have a Tom Cruise movie marathon, and thoroughly clean out my bedroom and get it decorated for Christmas. While I'm watching a Tom Cruise movie marathon.

I'm still the Momma in the Middle...the kids will be back before I know it, so I better get cracking on my to-do list!