Back to Life, Back to Reality

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For the past five years, I've often felt like I'm the printer from "Office Space" - all jammed up and occasionally beat on in an open field. I let life overwhelm me. Pure and simple. Five years is too long to feel that way.

I was sad and bitter to go through pregnancy loss...and the loss of my father. I was gravely disappointed over the results of the 2008 Presidential election. I was beyond angry at the ordeal my husband went through with his former agency. I was beaten down after going through health issue after health issue. I was discouraged over feeling like my freelancing was constantly taking three steps forward and two steps back and not achieving the numbers I wanted. And I was damned exhausted balancing a full-time job, freelancing, starting up a media/publishing company, supporting my husband's wacky schedule, trying to be the best mom possible and trying to get healthier in the meantime.

And so, I shut down for awhile. I stopped blogging. Dribs and drabs for a year or so and then nothing. I posted to friends on FB and Twitter, but nothing longer. I avoided things I didn't want to deal with at all costs. I lost my nerve for taking risks and became afraid of simple things, such as getting on an airplane or even going down a bounce-house slide. I was *not* a great wife or mom.

Earlier this year, I started turning that around. First things first, I quit my job. If a decade of building wasn't enough to make my freelance career sustain, nothing would be. At that point, I got to enjoy more work/life balance. I've been vigorously tackling health issues; by the start of next month, I'll have had 5 surgeries in 21 months...plus, I've been dealing with squaring away a few other health issues. I'm working damn hard to be a better wife and mom. I'm busting my butt getting the media/publishing company into the zone of recurring monthly profits with my business partner. I finished my first novel and am going through edits I got back, polishing it up, before it gets published. I'm freelancing whenever I can and my health allows.

And now, I'm getting back to blogging. I've missed it. Terribly. I own several blogs that are all mine and contribute to several others. Slowly but surely, I'm working on getting back up to speed on all of them.

So...what will I focus on here at Breakfast at Tiffany's? Well, I'm going to drop writing about NASCAR. I'm not a sportscaster, and although I've enjoyed several opportunities to write on the sport for other sites and may do so again in the future, I'm retiring that topic here. I'm going to work on my "Tiffany Takes On" column, tackling stupidity in the news, one story at a time. I'm going to gently sneak back into political blogging - thoughts, not rants. I'll have personal posts now and again. I'll share what I'm up to with writing - freelancing, non-fiction and fiction. And I might even tiptoe into a podcast or two.

It's going to be a process, not a one day victory. I might have fits and starts for awhile. But I hope you come with me! My stats tell me that quite a few people still follow this blog by feed and others through Google and I hope you'll stick with me. I've missed you!

Reflections from the Softer Side of Bad Weather

Over the past weeks, I've seen my Facebook and Twitter feeds nearly fill up with friends and family along the Eastern seaboard talking about first an earthquake, then Hurricane Irene, and now even more raining and flooding.  With the exception of the earthquake - weirdness, all around - the thoughts of the nasty weather than can hit the northeast and its after affects has me reflecing on my childhood.

Growing up on Price's Drive in Mountainhome, I remember losing power. A lot.  In the spring, in the summer, in the fall, and even occasionally in the winter.  While the rest of the Poconos - and even, sometimes, the rest of Barrett Township might be restored - we'd sometimes sit without power for days.

As an adult, I imagine this would be a large pain in the butt.  Especially with small children.  Who are as used to and spoiled by "modern conveniences" as I am - like a constantly-open refrigerator, satellite television, online games and flushable toilets.  (You can't get more than a flush or 2 out of a toilet when the power's out and no water is pumping - did you know that?  And you thought your mom was crazy for keeping buckets of water to use - it was to force flush the toilet.  Heh!  My mom would save every gallon jug on the planet and fill them all with water ahead of storms.  We'd have flushing ability for days.  Good stuff.)

What I remember, though, is the softer side of bad weather rolled in. 

Forget cooking on the stove - break out the sterno.  Something about cooking over sterno with it's flickering flame, while rain pounds down around, makes whatever food is being cooked taste all that much better.  And speaking of food, getting it was an adventure.  My mother stocked our basement like a nuclear attack was inevitable and would make our house the town food bank.  I'm. Not. Kidding.  But...it was the basement.  And with bad weather, there might be water accumulated on the floor, especially if the sump pump wasn't keeping up.  So going downstairs to retrieve some of the millions of cans of food could become an adventure. 

And the refrigerator!  And freezer!  Forget this worrying about food going bad after a day or so when the power was out.  Ours never did, even after several days.  We learned to pack the freezer tightly, so that the frozen foods insultated each other.  That thing would stay frozen for a week.  The fridge?  It became a game.  Ok.  What do we need for this meal?  Make a list.  Ok.  Remember which shelves those things are on?  Ok.  Now...3...2...1...GO!  And then we'd open the fridge and in 5 seconds or less gather all the necessary things.  If something was forgotten, too bad!  And hopefully you used up everything you took out, so another door-opening mission wasn't necessary.

And lights - I remember the softer side of lights.  My mother thought candles were dangerous.  And, considering the klutz that I am, that was probably a wise fear.  And flashlights were just plain clunky!  So we used hurricane lamps.  I. Love. Hurricane lamps!  In fact, I still have several in my house that I try to trot out a time or two a year, even though we've never needed them here.  A bottle of oil and a bit of wick would keep you lit for quite a long time.  You could read books, listen to the radio, or enjoy a game of cards, all by Hurricane lamp.

No video games.  No microwaves.  No generator - at least not at our house. 

Lots of radio listening - was another front coming?  Would power come back soon? 

Lots of talking - my mom and dad sharing their memories of storms long past.

Lots of reading - Lord knows, I've never had a shortage of books in my life.

Some games, some food, some sheer downtime.

Bad things happy when nasty weather rolls in...but sometimes, there are softer sides as well.

To those who endured or are enduring flooding and damage, those of us in drought-ridden Texas are thinking of you and hoping for the best!

Pool Time? Uh, no!

This afternoon, around 430 PM, when it was 700 degrees outside, Big Girl started begging me to go in the pool.

Now, a quick explanation. We have a $6 swimming pool. From the grocery store. Holds about a tablespoon of water and basically just lets the kids splash themselves and squirt the dog.

So I filled the pool with water...tepid water from the hose, but at least the spot where the pool is has afternoon shade.  Took 5 minutes to clean the pool out (dirt, leaves, etc., even though it was tipped on it's side!) and then another 5 to fill it.

Took 5 minutes to round up the kids' swimsuits and floaties (hey, gotta be safe in in a centimeter of water!) and then a combined 10 minutes to get the kids in their suits.

Turned them lose outside and drug a chair so I could supervise "poolside."

15 minutes later, they were done.

How's your math?

25 minutes to prep for something they were done with after 15.

But, oh! In those 15 minutes, they doused each other, the dog, their towels, me, and watered the dirt and cut firewood.

And I got a blood blister and a headache.

It's no wonder I have no interest in having a real pool in the backyard...we'd have to spend $40k and 3 months building something they'd lose interest in before it was finished filling.
Pool time? Uh, no!

A Terrible Toddler Malady! (Funny)

Big Girl just informed me that she has to go to the doctor right now so they can feel her tummy and tell her why she's so hungry...and then give her new stickers! Almost. Died. Laughing! What's your funniest toddler malady?

How bad is the economy? (Funny!)

(Hat tip to my Aunt Joan A.) THE ECONOMY IS SO BAD THAT: I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail. CEO's are now playing miniature golf. Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen. I saw a Mormon with only one wife. I bought a toaster oven and my free gift was a bank. Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America. Motel Six won't leave the light on anymore. A picture is now only worth 200 words. They renamed Wall Street " Wal-Mart Street ". When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room. And, finally... I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan , and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.