Preparing to Check In: CHECK IN!

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Welcome to the 1st edition of Tuesday Travel Tips with Tiffany!

When traveling by air, passengers must go through the sacred ritual of the security check. The security check is a necessary process that is often made painful because of traveler's ignorance on what to expect. In order to ease your experience, dear readers, let me offer the following advice:

BE ALERT. BE PREPARED. BE SMART!

Chances are:
  • that you're going to stand in line for at least a minute or two before reaching the TSA employee who will be checking your boarding pass versus your legal identification.
  • that there are going to be people in front of you in line.
  • that there are going to be people behind you in line.
  • that if I have to stand in line longer because you're an idiot, I'm not going to be a happy person.
  • that if you make the TSA employee's job harder than a minimum wage job should be, they're going to hate you.
So listen up! Here are the rules:
  1. Turn off your damn cell phone. Chuckie back at the office can wait another five minutes to hear your prescient remarks regarding the upcoming sales conference. No matter how good you think you are at multi-tasking, your Crackberry is robbing you of precious brain cells that you obviously need to be able to navigate a simple line.
  2. Observe - if everyone else in line is doing something, maybe you should consider doing the same thing.
  3. Put away your makeup bag - you haven't looked like your driver's license picture since, well, ever.
  4. Get out your boarding pass. Um, hello! That's the point of this little line here. Waiting to dig for it until you reach the head of the line is uber annoying and will make the people queued behind you begin to plot your death. Especially if the boarding pass you eventually dig out is for the wrong flight and you spend more time holding us up. If your stupidity necessitates your getting out of line, some of us may try to trip you as you walk past.
  5. Ditto your ID. Yes, you need to hand it to the TSA employee. No, you can't simply flash it, TV detective style. GET IT OUT. Don't be fumbling at the last minute. Have it already in hand. No, you can't use your gym membership card. No, your badge from the last Trekkie convention won't cut it. Have your driver's license, state-issued ID card, or passport IN HAND and READY before you even THINK of getting in line.
See, that's not so hard, is it? Watch around you, be alert, think fast, and we'll all have a better experience traveling!

Until next time...

Safe Travels!

Happy Fourth of July!

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Happy Fourth of July!

Thursday Thirteen #19

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Happy Fourth of July Weekend, ya'll!

In light of the coming three-day weekend, I thought I'd devote today's list to one of my favorite holidays: Independence Day!

Thirteen "Favorites" For the Fourth of July

  1. Grilled hot dogs - oh so unhealthy, but oh so yum!
  2. Pool parties - splish splash and relax...
  3. Going to the lake - little road trips to watery destinations are just the ideal 4th!
  4. Patriotic songs - guaranteed to make me tear up. Guaranteed.
  5. Parades,
  6. Marching bands,
  7. and ceremonies - more tears. Love these events.
  8. Red, white and blue - I think our nation's colors are just so striking - thanks, Britain!
  9. Time with family and friends - Independence Day is best shared with others.
  10. Baseball games - for some reason, games are just more fun on holidays!
  11. Da Beach - Growing up, we were down the shore nearly every 4th - I miss that!
  12. Grilled hot dogs - pregnant ladies get to mention food twice. I'm hungry even now!
  13. FIREWORKS - seriously, now. The 4th wouldn't be complete without a light show!
Have a wonderful holiday, everyone!

What do you read?

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I'm a reader.

Bet my book blog already gave that away, huh?

But it's been a defining descriptor in my life.

When other kids played video games, I read.

When the rest of my family was hunkered down in front of the TV, I read.

When I was grounded, when I was bored, when I was sick, when I was lonely, when I was hyper, when I was sad, when I simply woke up in the morning...I read.

It's always amazed me when other people profess to have no time to read. Bullshit. Pure, unadulterated bullshit. They're simply not making time to read.

In any case, I found this little survey over at Our Box of Rain, a blog maintained by one of my bloggy friends at How to Have a Baby. It's fun - steal and take yourself!

Over at Read and Release, we'll be spending the 4th of July weekend catching up on book reviews - I have about 15 to add - and then launching into this summer's theme: The Pulitzer Project. I'll be (attempting) to read through, in order, every book that has ever won the Pulitzer Prize. That's a lot! I'm counting on my neighborhood library to fill in the gaps when I don't already own the book.

Hope you have a great summer of reading, too!

(start survey)

"The Big Read reckons that the average adult has only read 6 of the top 100 books they've printed.

Well, let's see.

  1. Look at the list and bold those you have read.
  2. Italicize those you intend to read.
  3. Underline the books you LOVE.
  4. Reprint this list in your blog so we can try and track down these people who've read 6 and force books upon them ;-)"

The List:

  1. Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
    I am NOT a Jane Austen fan. I never will be. She annoys me. You can stone me now.
  2. The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien
    I think I'm the only person in the world who hates Tolkien. I just cannot get into his absurd world of fantasy. For whatever reason, my mind just tries to self destruct when I try.
  3. Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
  4. Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
    I'd actually rather not read this series, but I'm going to force myself to just to see what all the hoopla is about. I suspect I will be disappointed. Hubby got the first 3 or 4 as a gift but hasn't cracked them open, so we'll be tag-team reading them, like we did with The Dark Tower series a couple years ago.
  5. To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
  6. The Bible
  7. Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
  8. Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
  9. His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
  10. Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
  11. Little Women - Louisa M Alcott
  12. Tess of the D'Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
  13. Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
  14. Complete Works of Shakespeare
  15. Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
    I just read another du Maurier work and was disappointed...I'm counting on Rebecca to reverse my opinion of this author.
  16. The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien
  17. Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
  18. Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
  19. The Time Traveller's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
  20. Middlemarch - George Eliot
  21. Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
    Hated the movie. Going to skip the book. I know. Sin.
  22. The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
  23. Bleak House - Charles Dickens
  24. War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
    Eventually, I'll work up the courage to tackle this one.
  25. The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
    I've been chidded for missing this...I'll get to it, promise!
  26. Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
  27. Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
    Another one that I have to work up the courage to get to.
  28. Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
  29. Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
  30. The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
  31. Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
    And another...good old Tolstoy
  32. David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
  33. Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
  34. Emma - Jane Austen
  35. Persuasion - Jane Austen
  36. The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis
    Same as 33...but I've read the entire Chronicles.
  37. The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
  38. Captain Corelli's Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
    I've heard fabulous things about this book...it's on the list.
  39. Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
  40. Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne
  41. Animal Farm - George Orwell
  42. The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
  43. One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
  44. A Prayer for Owen Meany - John Irving
  45. The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
  46. Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
  47. Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
  48. The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood
  49. Lord of the Flies - William Golding
  50. Atonement - Ian McEwan
  51. Life of Pi - Yann Martel
  52. Dune - Frank Herbert
  53. Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
  54. Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
  55. A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
  56. The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
  57. A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
  58. Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
  59. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
  60. Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
  61. Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
  62. Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
  63. The Secret History - Donna Tartt
  64. The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
    Only so I can see what all the hype is about...
  65. Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
  66. On The Road - Jack Kerouac
  67. Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
  68. Bridget Jones's Diary - Helen Fielding
    The movie is hilarious...hopefully I'll like the book. I hate to go in reverse from movie to book, but we'll give it a try.
  69. Midnight's Children - Salman Rushdie
  70. Moby Dick - Herman Melville
  71. Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
  72. Dracula - Bram Stoker
  73. The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
  74. Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
  75. Ulysses - James Joyce
  76. The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
  77. Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
  78. Germinal - Emile Zola
  79. Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
  80. Possession - AS Byatt
  81. A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
  82. Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
  83. The Color Purple - Alice Walker
  84. The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
  85. Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
  86. A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
  87. Charlotte's Web - EB White
  88. The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
  89. Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
  90. The Faraway Tree Collection
  91. Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
  92. The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
  93. The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
  94. Watership Down - Richard Adams
  95. A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
  96. A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
  97. The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
  98. Hamlet - William Shakespeare
    Um, the entire works of Shakespeare is #14...
  99. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
  100. Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

Ok, of the 100, I've read 46. Of the 46, I've identified 9 as must reads. In addition, there are 12 that I intend to read. So that leaves 42...some I've never heard of. Others inspire no interest in me. I'm not remorseful of this - everyone has differing tastes in reading materials.

Incidentally, I'm wondering who originally compiled this list of 100 - I'm curious as to the make up and how these 100 books came to be lumped together. Is this based on lifetime sales? Perceived value of the writing? Someone's random opinion? What? In any case, I wouldn't take this as the ultimate "have you read it" list, but a great start to fuel your reading lists!

New Weekly Feature!

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Howdy, folks!

After much brainstorming and planning...and a few frustrating experiences that spurred the idea, I'd like to announce a new weekly feature coming to Breakfast at Tiffany's, beginning next Tuesday and running indefinitely into the future.

Called "Tuesday Travel Tips", it will feature my advice (born largely of my frustration) to those less bright individuals around us who get on planes, stay at hotels and rent cars. I'm going for a humorous tone, here, but am hoping that the little snippets I publish every week may help just one person, who can then stop screwing up and pissing me off! :-)

Hubby helped with the brainstorming and I believe we've got 30 topics so far, so this should continue for quite some time into the future. I'm going to "cheat" and pre-write many of the posts and just future date them, so you can reliably count on seeing these weekly posts at the same time each Tuesday.

And if ya'll have any funny travel observations to share - or questions to ask on protocol - just pop 'em over to me in the comments section of any related blog post, and I'll work them in!

Here's a preview of some items to be discussed:

-Water is a liquid, too
-Overhead bins are not expandable
-Flight Attendants: not your personal servant

Ok, so those are all related to flying, but I promise that there are some hotel and rental car ones thrown in, too. I just happen to know flying best!

Hope you all come back weekly to read Tuesday Travel Tips!