In the Middle of...Child Cell Phone Safety

I recently bought both of my littles a cell phone. Yes, they're still a bit on the young side for that, but after thinking about it for a long time - like, really, a year - I decided it was the best course of action.

Having a cell phone doesn't mean the kids now have free reign over the internet, apps and all of the craziness that goes along with it.

*This Momma* has gone all NSA on the little ones, loading up their devices with parental monitoring software so that I have oversight of their usage and control over how the devices are used.

I'd like to share the apps I've installed so far - and then see what your favorites are to use for your kiddos' devices.

First up was Family Link. Family Link is an actual Google product and designed specifically so that families can safely allow children to use cell phones and other devices. And so far, I'm just loving it! I set up a profile for each kiddo and the parameters around their usage that I want to enforce. And it takes it from there! Every time they want to install an app, they have to ask me first - either their cell sends mine a request or they have to physically hand their cell to me to put in a password. Any time I need them to shut down right then and there, I just have to punch a button and their phones go dead. And when I need to locate their phones, or grab their attention, punch another button and even if their cells are on silent, they ring away. Very robust and entirely free.
Download here: Android - Apple

Next up, Screen Time. With this software, I can see exactly what apps the kids have use, when, and for how long. I can set limits on how long they can have screen time for in general or limit specific apps. And I can give them specific tasks - read: chores - to do that they have to accomplish before getting screen time back. This app also allows me to set various times when they can't have screen time - after bed, while in school, etc. Finally, I can check their exact web browser history - both searches and sites visited. Screen Time has a free side and then more robust features if you're willing to pay. I'm enrolled in the free trial currently and think I'm going to sign up for the paid side once done.
Download here: Amazon - Android - Apple

Last but not least, Life 360. This app lets me track the kids in real time. To some extent, I can do the same with Family Link, but this is more geared toward that. I can literally see a map of where they are and, if need be, plot a course to get there. The app allows you to name commonly visited locations like home, work and school and to get notifications as people arrive in and depart from these locations. To begin, you set up a family circle and invite all the cell numbers you want to participate. For kiddos who are in more than one family unit, they can be in more than one family circle. For that matter, there's no real age for this map. Worried about your elderly mom wandering? Install this app on her device and you can track in real time. Like other parental apps, this has a free and paid component and I'm also in this one's free trial, most certain I will purchase at the end.
Download here: Amazon - Android - Apple

Here's what I'm not tracking: calls in/out and texts in/out. I gave both great thought, and it looks like there are apps to do both. But I do want to preserve some privacy for the kids, so they can feel like they can text with, for instance, their Dad without being spyed upon. However, both kids know they have to hand over their phone whenever asked, they can only give out their number with my permission, and I have complete control over their phone book. Yes, this could be an area with potential for issues in the whole parental oversight of their devices thing, but we're going with some trust/trust-building for now.

If your kiddos already have cell phones or other devices like tablets (I monitor my kids' Kindle Fires as well), what software do you use for oversight and tracking? Please share - I'd love to know and your insight could help others!

In the Middle of Worry

I've been worried about something for a bit now. Not a major worry. Nothing world ending, nothing health or kiddo related. A minor worry, really. Without getting into specifics, it has to do with one of my (many) jobs and although I should have shrugged it off weeks ago, it's stayed with me. Nagged me. Woken me up daily at 4 a.m.

I know, I'm a bit melodramatic.

I didn't know what in the world to do about it. Should I say something? Write an email? Make a big stink over something that's ultimately a little issue? Enlist a neutral 3rd party? Just let it go?

I couldn't process it. At all.

Then, last night, I remembered the Youth lesson I taught the last week of August about stress.

In the lesson, which coincided with the start of the school year, we talked about how there's so dang many stressors in life. Work, school, family, chores, friends, health...the list is pretty literally never-ending.

All of those areas, if they get a bit out of sync, can cause stress. Stress that leads to worry. Worry that leads to anxiety. Anxiety that leads to panic. Panic that freezes us in place and prevents us from the life we're meant to live.

And God doesn't want us to live like that!

No, God doesn't promise us our lives are going to be perfect, our paths without boulders to climb, our roads without detours.

But he does promise us that no matter what's going on - big worries, little worries, small issues, potentially life-ending issues - he's with us.

The perfect verse for this, and it was in the lesson as well, comes from Philipians 4:6-7:

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

So...I decided I wasn't going to fly off the handle and do something rash about my situation. I wasn't going to poke the bear or try to precipitate an outcome that wasn't meant to be. Instead, I was going to cast that worry to God as a part of my normal daily prayers.

I have a prayer mantra. I say it probably 5 dozen times a day, in all situations. And while I'm saying it, I'm thinking about what I'm worrying about or giving thanks for at the time. I highly recommend this prayer mantra - it's played an integral role in turning my life back around for the positive the past six months. And it's so simple! So here it is:

Dear God, thank you for the many blessings in my life!

That probably wasn't what you were expecting, was it? But it's right in line with the verse above - first and foremost, I give thanks for all that I have. And even in the worst of times, my goodness do I have a lot! While I'm doing so, I have in my heart any petitions or praises that are current to that time. And God's got the rest.

Oh, and my worry? Well, it's gone now. See, after casting it to God, I got an email and then a phone call this morning that other people I hadn't even known were working on the same issue had resolved it and there wasn't a thing I needed to do. Poof. Gone.

Many worries don't go away like that. That junk that was gunking up my life in the past years took serious hard work to get gone. See, while God's there with us, he also expects us to work our tails off both in his service and to protect our families and prepare ourselves for the future while living our best lives today.

We can't just sit around and expect a prayer to solve all things or magically bring us solutions. Instead, I believe prayer both sets the wheel in motion and surrounds us with protection - especially our psyches and hearts - as we work under God's guidance to achieve what we need to in life while working diligently to live as He wants us to live.

What do you worry about? Do you have a personal prayer mantra? How do you talk to God about your worries? If you're agnostic or atheist, what is your own method of dealing with worry? Please share below - enquiring minds want to know!

What I'm Reading, Nonfiction:Rachel Hollis' "Girl, Wash Your Face"

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I've never been in a book club. Can you imagine that? I read a couple hundred books a year and have done so for decades. But yet, I've somehow never been in a book club!

Well, all that has (sorta) changed, with this book: Rachel Hollis' "Girl, Wash Your Face."

I've belonged to an online mom's group for a decade. We met originally through pregnancy and parenting boards on a site called iVillage many moons ago and somehow, a couple dozen of us have stuck together now for 10+ years - some even longer - and are a daily part of each other's lives. I've met a few in real life, talk with some on the phone, and text with others. Whenever I have something to share, need to ask a question, want support for an issue or life caves in, that group, now on Facebook, is where I head first. I received an incredible gift from these girls earlier this year in a time of need, I get (and hopefully give) awesome advice and it's just...well, it's my village.

A few weeks ago, one of the great gals mentioned a particular book she thought we should read together and discuss. Sounds good! Except, I suck at commitment sometimes when it isn't to my kids or my work, and so now I'm days behind in reading. So as a way to publicly share the impact this book is having on me and keep myself more accountable in keeping up with the group...plus, possibly share some truths from my life in raw honesty, I decided to post about it here.

Have any of you read this book? What are your thoughts? Here's the premise, in brief: we all have heard and began to believe certain lies that keep us from living our best lives, or have fallen into traps that are equally destructive. In this book, blogger and podcaster Rachel Hollis lays out these lies and discusses how she got past their hold on her own life.

I'd love to hear your thoughts if this book has also been in your TBR pile! I'm going to commit to posting on each chapter here as I post my responses in the group. I may not share as many details here as in there - that group is private and some things are just meant to be kept more private, as open as I try to be - but I promise to share a lot!

Will you join me? Buy your own copy and start reading today!